Marriage isn’t easy
Marriages are challenging and complex. Even people that get along well can struggle sometimes. That’s where couples therapy can help. Occasionally, some issues can work out before people get to the point of separation, and it can save a marriage. Other times, couples decide that they need to go their separate ways. What if you could save your marriage? How do you know if you need couples therapy? Here are ten signs that your marriage needs couples therapy.
1 You have communication problems
It’s natural to struggle with communication at times, and all relationships have missed communications. If you find that you’re frequently getting into situations where you and your partner don’t understand each other, that’s a place where you can talk to a couple’s counselor. Miscommunications can cause resentment or frequent arguments. That’s why couples therapy can help you. You may be trying to speak your language, and they might be trying to speak theirs, but you’re at an end pass. A couple’s therapist is a translator who can help you mediate these communication problems.
Some people cheat on their partners, and there are many reasons for that. They could have an affair in secret that you found out about, or they could come out and confess that they’ve been unfaithful.either way, infidelity can cause a rift in a relationship. It’s different if you have an open marriage because, in that situation, you’d communicate about everyone involved in the relationship; there wouldn’t be any secrets or sneaking. Cheating comes with anger, sadness, resentment, and the feeling that there’s no hope in a relationship. A couples counselor can help you work through these complexities and work through them or separate in the healthiest way possible.
3 Issues with parenting
Parenting styles https://www.topteny.com/how-do-i-file-for-paternity/ can differ from person to person. You may be strict, whereas your partner may be laidback, and if you’re not on the same page with parenting, this is a reason that you could see a couple’s counselor. A couple’s counselor can strategize with two parents, and even if their parenting styles differ, they can help them get on the same page or come to a compromise. In other cases, it might be a matter of respecting each other’s views. Either way, a couples counselor can help with parenting issues.
4 You don’t want to be around your partner
If you feel like you’re avoiding contact with your partner, that’s a sign that couples therapy needs to happen. An underlying issue or multiple issues is causing this to occur. Maybe, you know what they are, or perhaps you’re in denial. It could also be that you don’t know. If you’re avoiding going home, or find the need to start arguments over little things, have a short temper with your partner, then there’s something deeper happening. A couples counselor can help you learn to stop avoiding the situation.
5 you can’t stop fighting with your partner
Arguments happen, but when you’re constantly bickering and can’t come to a resolution, it’s time to seek the help of a therapist. Therapists are excellent mediators. They can hear both sides and help you come to an understanding. You can also work on ways to communicate your upset in therapy so that anger doesn’t result in explosive arguments. They can teach you how to “fight right.”
6 There’s a lack of sex
For many people, they know there’s a problem in their marriage if there’s no intimacy. When sex is absent in a partnership where this wasn’t the case previously, some issues need to be addressed. There could be multiple things going on, but a couple’s counselor will help you analyze the situation and figure out why there’s no intimacy. It might be an issue that has nothing to do with the marriage; one partner might have a history of sexual abuse or trauma, or maybe, they have depression and haven’t been in the mood lately. Even if it’s something that mainly affects one member of the couple, such as trauma and they need to work on that on their own, it’s still a joint effort in terms of understanding the other person’s perspective. That’s where couples counseling can support both of you.
7 You’re not confiding in your partner and are talking to others instead
One sign that you may need couples counseling is that you don’t want to talk to your partner about deep issues and are confiding in other people while withholding the same information from your spouse. If you don’t feel connected to your partner, that’s a red flag. There’s a barrier of emotional intimacy, and that’s something that a counselor can help you and your partner work through.
8 You don’t feel understood
No one can be understood all of the time. We’re complex as human beings, but if you feel that your partner doesn’t get you fundamentally, that’s something to talk about in couples therapy.
9 There are themes and problems you can’t resolve on your own
There may be a variety of issues in your marriage that you can’t seem to work through by yourself, and that’s normal. No relationship is perfect, but if the same repetitive theme comes up over and over again, it’s time to address it in couples counseling.
10 You keep thinking about divorce
If you imagine your way out of a relationship, it’s time to go to couples counseling. When you envision yourself without your spouse, there’s a difficult decision to make, but you don’t have to do it by yourself. A couples counselor can help you understand why you’re thinking about divorce, and you can work through your issues with the anxiety surrounding separation and any other matters. You can do this through online couples counseling or with a local therapist. Either way, these are concerns that can be worked through in therapy.
Don’t be afraid to reach out for help
Regardless of the issue, a couple’s counselor can help you and your partner work through many different problems. Don’t be afraid to reach out for help if you see yourself struggling in your marriage.
Marie Miguel Biography
Marie Miguel has been a writing and research expert for nearly a decade, covering a variety of health-related topics. Currently, she is contributing to the expansion and growth of a free online mental health resource with BetterHelp.com. With an interest and dedication to addressing stigmas associated with mental health, she continues to specifically target subjects related to anxiety and depression.